End of mid-sem tests

Today marks the end of my mid-semester tests, but I don't feel happy at all. I don't feel anything. I know I didn't do well for my last two papers.



Sometimes I can't help but to wonder why.. Why.. I studied so hard but I still don't get the results I want. I tried so much but I just can't score the same just those who are smart. Why is this so. Sometimes I just wonder why can't I be born smart.



This is just not fair. Where is the justice?



But I know I should be contended with what I have and what I am now.



I have been studying harder than when I'm in Secondary school and that time, my dad asked me why am I studying so hard when I'm in Polytechnic now. I tried, but I still don't get the results I want. I can guess that my mid-semester test results wouldn't be good.



Break is here, but there are many projects to be done. Both individual and group projects.
I think I prefer tests and all as compared to projects. So many projects deadlines are like stressing you out.



And you know.. Being fickle-minded will harm you one day. Because in my case, it did.
I hurt someone deeply and further. I should be firm with my decision in the first place, but I didn't. I'm sorry.



Music do helps, even a little, a bit .. In the situation I am in now.