Irritated

I should be studying for my History now but I need to let my feelings out.

You know sometimes how much I dislike you?
I’m typing here ‘dislike’ and not ‘hate’ , I hope in the future it won’t change to ‘hate’
either.I thought as you gets older , you will change, your attitude will change .
To the better. But I guess not.

I thought now when you are in a relationship,your attitude will change to the better
too. But I guess, the starting of your relationship you did change a little,
but as time goes by, it’s back to the old time.

If you’re not a special someone ( not friends ) or what, I could have given you
back my attitude and all those shit. SHIT you know? I believe you know.
If you’re not older than me, I could have reacted back, and ‘fight’ back.
And there goes our ‘fighting’ , our no communication for days or weeks.

Sometimes, we shouldn’t be too over. Right?
You don’t like others treat you in this manner then why the hell are you
treating me in this manner? It sucks, totally.

You never know when one day, I will scream at you back.
And there we goes, screaming at each other. Closing the doors with all our
strength and all those shits.

You never know how many times I have cried because of how you have treated me,
your words and all. You don’t know, because I have always cry in silent.
I hate this, and I really do.

If you did realize, I have trying to lessen our communication these days.

I don’t know when I can endure this until.

I hate this.